Tuesday, August 24, 2010

college

The first three days of living on my own have been hard. I've never experienced homesickness before, but I do now. It seems like I can't concentrate in my classes, nor can I make any friends, because I seem so down and depressed. Added upon my homesickness is my desire to know what I want to be when I grow up. I get nervous every time I ponder about it. I switched my major from athletic training to general education, which cost me almost 300 more dollars extra in book fees because the Weber State bookstore won't give me a refund on my athletic training books, because I took the plastic off the books. Added upon all of that is my lack of a job and friends. searching for a part time job in our current economy is frustrating to say the least. the only way that I can get through college is to find a job to support myself. It's been a lonely three days for me. My dorm room is the worst prison cell on the face of the planet. It seems like a weightlifter had dropped a dozen 700 pound weights on my back, and I have to carry those around from class to class. I'm so scared, and there is only one piece of knowledge that will help me get through this: My knowledge of my savior's atonement. My elder brother, Jesus Christ, suffered the agonies of Gethsemane so that I can return to live to my Heavenly Father again. In the third chapter of Mosiah, seventh verse, we read, "And lo, he shall suffer temptations, and pain of body, hunger, thirst, and fatigue, even more than man can suffer, except it be unto death; for behold, blood cometh from every pore, so great shall be his anguish for the wickedness and the abominations of his people." Christ knows exactly how I feel right now. He suffered for it in the Atonement. I'll never be alone with His atonement in mind, and that goes for everyone. He knows what you have experienced, and He is anxious to help you.
I also found words of comfort in section 121 in the Doctrine and Covenants. Verse 7 and 8 read, "My son, peace be unto thy soul: thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes." Later in the section it speaks of Job, the "perfect" man from the book of Job. We all know of his trials, he lost everything he had, and then lost even more. I am not yet as Job, so I guess I should stop complaining. I'll get through this. I know I will. Pray for me!

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